Back to business

The first day back to school. That time of year when the sun is hotter than ever, public swimming pools are deserted, and a mall parking lot is jam packed. To make a long story short, preparing for the first day of school is probably the saddest thing a student goes through. Depending on how you look at it, every student handles the first day jitters differently. For instance: me. Every year when school comes back around I get knots in my stomach, making it hard to have any appetite whatsoever. I use to think once I got a little older the nerves would go away, but every year they seem to get worse. Last year (my 1st year of college) I wasn't able to eat very much for a whole week...I lost 6 pounds that same week. What made it worse was the fact that I wasn't living at home anymore. (And let me tell you, living on-campus is not as much fun as the movies make it seem).

Again, this year I find myself one year older, with my same job, without a car, without a boyfriend, and still living on-campus. But this year I don't want the nerves to get the best of me. It's my 2nd year of college and I don't want to regret not making an opportunity for myself. And that's exactly what happened.

As a freshman studying journalism I started writing for my campus newspaper, The Pan-American. It first started out as volunteer, but come 2nd semester I started getting paid for my stories. This was the first time in my entire life I had every really had a job that pays. Yeah, sure I did some volunteer hours for school clubs, but I liked the fact that I was getting paid for working hard at something I love: writing.


Now a year later working for The Pan-American I made my way to top. I'm now one of the best writers and (not to float my own boat) one of the most reliable employees. But I know none of this wouldn't have been possible without God. Throughout all the times I thought I wasn't going to be able to write a certain story, He pulled me through. And it shows because now I have my very first story in The Pan-American's annual magazine. (Which we celebrated yesterday, the first day). I should mention only the BEST writers and only the BEST stories are put in the magazine!


Talk about a good first day back, huh?




I guess I should mention something about my classes...since that is the point of the term 'first day.'

Like all colleges, school is school. It's just something you have to do in order to make a name for yourself. But, on the bright side you always have your best friends to get you through the boring parts. I know for one of my biggest issues I have is not knowing who's going to be in my classes. I didn't have to worry about that too much this year...well I did have my sociology class which consisted of mostly freshmen, but I did manage to plan my astronomy class my friend Kevin. (As weird as this may sound, we became friends through my ex and just remained friends). And to make things better my astronomy professor never showed up! (LOL)

One year and one day down. Only 2 more years to go and maybe I'll be the one not showing up to work.

Check out The Pan-American's 2nd annual magazine!
http://issuu.com/thepanamerican/docs/8458_utpa_web/1?e=1287913/9058687




Mix it up

Every year at the beginning of August students fight their ways to the mall on the search for the latest styles. Here's the thing though, I never wanted to wear clothes that everyone else was wearing. I didn't think I could pull off what other girls were wearing in the body I had. This mind set came from my life-long struggle with self-esteem. It wasn't until my senior year of high school did I feel confident enough to start wearing things I normally wouldn't. (For example, Daisy Dukes. But now I own 15 of them). And when I got to college I wore shorts nearly everyday. And in the winter I wore tights, something I swore I would never wear because my thighs were 'too big.'

 

 

Now in my 2nd year of college and almost 2 years of being confident in myself, I found a style that fits me and only me. I realized no one really cares about your size, but people do notice how confident you are. If I chose to hate myself for not looking a certain way then I will never be happy and the world will see me the same way I see myself. So, don't be afraid to mix things up. Whether that be with clothes, a job, or a new relationship. Only good things can come from taking chances.

What I'm wearing

Top: Sheer Lace & Crochet Top, Forever 21

Bottom: Truth NYC, www. myclothingcompany.com

Shoes: Lavinia, Mossimo Supply Co., Target

 

Snapshot 1

Going the distance

'Write this. Write that.' That's all I hear sometimes. It's all I do. Working for a college newspaper is hard work. And very rarely does it pay off. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the opportunity to enhance my journalism skills. But at the same time I want to write about things I love and things I think are important. For me that's music.

 

I never thought I would be on the road to becoming a student-journalist. Yet here I am climbing the latter to become a music journalist.

 

I've always loved what music does to people. The way we relate to one song is beautiful. That one songwriter had something to say, something no one could put into words yet he was able to. That one song has one meaning yet millions of fans create a meaning based on their own circumstances.  

 

Out of the countless artists out there one has caught my eye: Lana Del Rey. Just to set the record straight; I first listened to her before she made it big. (So don't be callin' me mainstream). I know the key to getting where you want to go is to first do what you don't want to do. With that said, I'll write what I'm told, cross my T's, and dot my I's. Who knows? Maybe one day I'll be that Rolling Stone reporter sitting across from Lana Del Rey. In the mean time, I'll write like the wind.

 

 

 

The SAT scores

It's done. My application to UT Austin is signed, sealed, and delivered. Now the only thing left is to sit and wait for my acceptance letter. (Which I believe is the most excruciating part) But I've had a revelation. In the middle of the submission process I noticed it was a requirement to send in my SAT scores. Now look, I graduated high school a year ago and only sent my SAT score to one college: UTPA (my current school). I was mortified! How was I going to send the score in? Was it even still possible? (After some research, I found out it was doable to send old SAT scores to a new college...for a price of $20, of course).


My transcripts were sent, my resume was complete, and my SAT score was still pending. I was a wreck. The only way I was able to keep track of my application was through the UT MyStatus. Something you need a username to access, a username I didn't have yet. Oh man, when that UT Austin Office of Admissions email popped up one week later I knew it had to be the username. Five minutes later I was in my UT MyStatues account. I ran my eyes over the 'Completed' tab and what do I see? My SAT score checked off and submitted. I couldn't believe it. How in the world did they end up there? When did I send them? And then it hit me. I sent them my senior year of high school.

I remember, clear as day, sitting in my high school's College and Career room, signing up for the SAT's (my 2nd attempt, btw), and requesting the score to be sent to UTPA and UT Austin. It was always the plan to attend UTPA (my mom's wish), but I always wanted something bigger. I had always loved reading magazines, books, and English was always my best subject. My 17-year-old self thought 'Hey, why not be a writer?' But I was scared to choose an artsy major. People had always told me to stick to the medical profession because doctors and nurses make 'good money'. But I knew I could never survive college level Biology, Chemistry, and Anatomy. I had always struggled with math and sciences and still do. After some heavy thinking I decided to follow what I love and become a writer. The first week of college I changed my major to Journalism.

One year of college later, I find myself applying to UT Austin. Can you believe it? UT freakin' Austin. They have the BEST communications department in the state of Texas! And to think I was worried about SAT scores that were already sent. I have to say I was beginning to doubt if I would be accepted or not. But I'm not anymore. My heart tells me my 17-year-old self sent those SAT scores for a reason. My heart tells me God knew my future before I even could. How amazing is that? To know God had my back this whole time is completely and utterly reassuring. He knew what my heart desired: to write. And I can't wait to get started.

Me, myself, and I

Audrey Hepburn once said, 'I don't want to be alone, I want to be left alone,' which, until yesterday, I never understood. I woke up like any other day and just felt...well for lack of a better word: sad. But not the type of sad where you wrap yourself in a blanket and cry, no. It was the type of sad where all you want to do is be alone. The type of sad when you feel sad for no apparent reason.

I had heard of this feeling once before, but never experienced it. My first response to hearing such a thing was, 'How could that be?' I thought maybe the whole 'feeling sad for no reason' thing was just an over exaggerated fact. Oh, how I wish that was true.

I spent the entire day alone in the house. But that's just what I needed. Everything needed to disappear for while. My mind wondered on many things, but there's one thing that doesn't seem to erase from my mine and I so badly want the pain of these memories to go away. (A past relationship, for those of you who haven't guessed it). Maybe in reality, in the deep subconscious of my mind, I don't want the memoires to fade away. Am I kidding myself that something so great could easily be forgotten? I'm 100 percent aware we won't get back together, after all I am the one who called things off. Plus, he doesn't deserve to go through the pain again. He deserves to move on and as do I. I know being 'friends' is rather difficult. I mean, how could you be friends with someone you once liked? You can't because there's a reason you feel for them once and there will be a reason to fall for them again.

I'm at peace with how things worked out. Yes, sometimes I doubt if I made the right decision but after finding myself again I decided to apply to UT Austin. I'm going to go off to a new university and a new city to study what I love to do: write. So how did things not work in my favor? Do you think I would have made a life changing decision if I was still in a relationship? Of course not! And I won't be alone. I'll have my parents (who are moving to Austin in August), my aunt and uncle, and the countless new friends I'll meet.

That's why there's absolutely nothing wrong with being alone, nothing. Trust me when I say, it's okay to be that girl who doesn't always have a boyfriend. And it's okay to not have many friends. None of that matters. The only thing that matters is what you think of yourself. Which is why being 'left alone,' as Audrey puts it, can be good for us. I don't know about you but I really think there's a certain type of freedom that comes with being alone. You have the freedom to do what you want and not worry if your significant other will be upset with you for not tagging him along. You have the freedom to go out with the girls and talk for hours on end.

Remember once you enter a relationship it's no longer about you. It's 'you and me' until the end. But you won't learn to appreciate your single and alone (I mean that in the best way possible) freedom until you lose it for a while and after shoving some Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Therapy ice cream down your throat! Having that alone time with yourself can make a difference from feeling the urge to find someone who completes you or accepting the fact that you're already complete on your own.

La la For Lana

Trending news this week: Lana Del Rey's Ultraviolence hit stands this Monday and without a doubt has a shot at the #1 spot. Like many other Lana fans, I'm one happy camper just about now. I remember being bored out of my mind one summer day two years ago listening to my Pandora radio and wanna take a guess at what song popped up? Ding ding ding! Born to die. At first I had no idea who or what I was listening to, but half way through the Lana's retro beats and angelic voice I asked myself: Who is this? From first listen I went 'La la For Lana.'

Two years later, after Lana's debut in 2012 it's time for some new, much wanted, tunes. But what makes Lana so irresistible? Is it the fact that she makes you want to Ride on a motorcycle for a living? Or is it the fact that her music makes you feel like you're living an episode of Mad Men? Whatever the case may be, with the way things are going for Ms. Del Rey it doesn't look like she's going anywhere anytime soon. (Thank God!)

So I ask you, what makes Lana so irresistible?

For me, Lana takes it away with her vintage look and sound. When I listen to her soft melodies of Ride I no longer feel like the same goody-to-shoe me. I hang onto this 'Live Fast. Die Young. Be Wild. Have Fun.' mentality of life. Which can be a really good thing sometimes. I never do anything crazy or anything I may regret or in that case something that could put me in jail. But, there's something about Lana's eccentric lyrics that take all those worries off my mind. Even if it's only for a short while, we should all be a little crazy from time to time. I'm not saying for you to get wasted, I'm not saying for you to be stupid, I'm saying let go of your insecurities, worries, and doubts and just focus on the Ride life has to offer you.

If Lana's music can make me feel so care free, I wonder how she makes her millions of fans feel? Should I dare mention she only has two albums!

Now that you know the trending news this week, I can now listen to Lana Del Rey's Ultraviolence for the 10th time this week!